Valet parking tweets that caught my attention over the past few days...

I hadn't noticed these until just now. Most striking is the brash fellow who claims to have stolen change out of every car he valet parked at the Grammy Awards event. Nice, huh? And he's proud of himself!

Yep... I have the impression most of them learn how to drive manuals while on-the-job.

I still don't understand how on-demand valet services make money. But it seems like a great service... as long as they keep the incompetent and the scumball types of valets out of their organizations.

Sometimes valets accidentally change the radio station while trying to turn the music down. Or they might accidentally touch a wrong button. But I think too often they are playing with stereos, trying them out. Valets should shut the music off and concentrate on their driving. Period. They should NEVER listen to music while driving. 

Valet managers, if you have an employee who smells that bad, they shouldn't be driving your customer's cars.

This reflects poor management. Valet workers should pick-up their chicks someplace else, not plant a reason in their heads never to return. Sometimes females like this attention, but most of the time they don't, judging from the tweets I've read.

This is funny, but I'm also including this here for valet workers. Sometimes using a valet service is a big deal to somebody. It's not a mere convenience, but also a luxury they are indulging in. Everybody using these services should be made to feel this way.

That's cool of Mr. Lee not to be mad, but unless there is an issue with the engine, it should not be revved. It's completely unprofessional. Where is the valet manager? This is poor oversight.

Alright, that's funny. On the one hand, valets hate coins. They don't want to run with them jingling in their pockets. On the other hand, they will steal them out of your cup-holder. So it's an odd situation.

Yep. That's nothing new. It happens. I advocate leaving 2 or 4 quarters in the cup-holder. Shoot video of you leaving the quarters there and getting out of the car. When you get the car back, shoot video of you getting in the car and take the camera lens straight to the cup-holder. If the quarters are gone, hold everything. Have the manager summoned. Tell the manager you want your money back plus a refund of your parking fee, and show the proof that they have a thief in their midst. 

Yah, that happens too. They give cars away to the wrong people. Use my "codeword method" idea. (Look for it on the right side of this page.) It adds a layer of defense. I have offered "Valet Client ID Cards," which are better, but nobody is prudent enough to buy one. Oh well.

When a valet parking service works as it should.

Poor management oversight.

That's not appropriate valet conduct...

That's a big compliment for one of the new on-demand valet parking services.

Yikes... That's not good, is it? Poor management oversight yet again.

This is the most popular complaint on Twitter about valet parking services. I would not tolerate a long wait. I would tell them to refund the parking fee and I would want additional compensation. Because waiting 45 minutes to be reunited with your car isn't part of the deal.

This is another case of bad management oversight. Valets should not be bringing their smartphones to work. Period. The risks and lost productivity outweigh the benefits.

This is for consumers. If you have a broken window and it shouldn't be rolled down, speak-up! You'll save everybody stress and hassle. Better yet, put tape over the controls along with a "broken, don't touch" note.

Lock all your doors except your door. Roll-up all the windows except your window. This increases the chances that your car will be safe and secure while it is parked, and it keeps drunk fools from hopping into your car when you first arrive. 

Nice... Nothing surprises me with valet parking services. The standards are low, the training is poor, the management oversight is weak... with perhaps a few rare exceptions.

Damage happens. It's valet parking roulette. And sometimes you're the unlucky one. Unfortunately, most valet services turn these matters into long, frustrating ordeals where they stall and dodge their responsibility to make it right.

Don't leave your sunglasses in the car. Don't leave ANYTHING in it that you don't want stolen. If you do, flip a coin. That's your chance of it still being there when your car is returned to you.

Why offer a luxury valet service to your customers if you can't get or are unwilling to staff it properly? 

Uh oh... 

That is unfortunate... And not uncommon. Valet workers screw-up, especially the rookies.

Yah, this happens too. Sometimes a new valet marks the wrong location coordinates on the ticket, or the valet forgot to mark down any location coordinates at all, and then they have to run through the whole garage looking for the car.

Oops... another lost car!

Somebody got screwed.

To lessen the chance that a valet parking service will drain your battery, leave your headlight setting on "auto." Most people do this, so valet workers assume your headlight setting is also on auto. If it isn't, well, a dead battery can easily happen.

Uh oh, another damaged car.

And here it is...

At least it was a rental! That is a pretty bad screw-up though, isn't it? (The valet probably was fired.)

Just another example of the low standards that are common in the valet parking business.

That $60 should be back in this customer's pocket. Valet companies will not ordinarily volunteer to refund your parking fee when a fiasco strikes. You have to firmly say that you want it.

Phone chargers are very commonly stolen by valet workers. I have seen many Twitter posts that have given me this impression.

There has been some really bad, really cold weather in much of the country recently, so I can certainly understand this valet's sentiment. And generally the tipping is not any better in foul weather conditions. It can be a difficult, low paying job.

Ha! Don't throw your keys to the valet. Don't toss them. Nobody should ever throw your keys. Turn your engine off. Maintain control of your ONE KEY until you have been given a claim ticket and are certain you are dealing with a real valet. 

Why turn off the engine? Aren't I inconveniencing the valet and causing unnecessary wear to my starter?

I recommend this because it's too easy for criminals to steal cars off the valet "ramp." And yes, this happens. Cars get stolen this way! No kidding. If you leave it running, some low-life can easily hop into it and drive it away. Sometimes these cars get wrecked a few blocks away. Sometimes they are never seen again.

And don't give the valet any more than the one key necessary to operate your vehicle. Valets lose keys. It's going to be a huge mess if you give them the keys to your life and they lose all of them.

More about how to smartly use valet parking services HERE.